Audrey Kitching

you see it igby? i feel this great, great pressure comming down on me. constantley comming down on me. its crushing me.

the last 7 and a half months have been full of insomnia.. i would be awake until 6 or 7 am . the last two weeks i have gotten best sleep i can remember. not talking to you and living my life without you in it has been a weight lifted. how long can one keep caring and worrying when your self destruction has hit a path of no return.  my pedestal was to tall to climb off , infact thats the reaosn for the high horse. im working with a good friend joey simmrin at one moment mgmt.. i wouldnt want anyone else as my manager. la on sunday.. meetings. dravaen shoe ad. meethings. jessica louise. meetings. halo guitar add. meetings. west coast choppers shannon brooke marie antoinette shoot. meetings. filming. busy busy busy.   met with spencers about a add compain today. did a japanese fahsion magazine that should be out any day now. lots of big things comming soon guys promise. me and hanna hitler and dreamboat you know how it goes. so much negativity everywhere so bad for my aura. i love how much this site hates to promote me haha  rock and roll!  i called my agent the moment that i caught the train. i let him know im going know where and hes invited. if he leaves tonight he just might help me find it... but this is my burden to bare not his and im a physchic without a side kick holding the fusture hostage. no one can stop me form doing what i will do.. not even an army with a thousand uzis .. i would come out with a flame thrower and melt you mother fuckers to the ground.  im exhausted but i get to see boy in la and everything gets started and tied together. you guys will flip over this tshirt.. best thing ever! i want it out now with rock threads. alot of people ask me for advice.. best thing i can say is never let anyone step on you or even think of treating you of anything more the worth. people confuse arrogant and conceited with pride..and ill tell you what.. i have a god damn colassal amount of fucking pride.

sometimes in life you have to hurt yourself. you have to put yourself in a situation you know you will be hurt in your mind and soul. certain situations in life are much like drugs, they are bad for you, causing pain and taking over your life spiritual sense... yet you still enable yourself to keep going back for more. no matter how bad it is for your aura it will heal you in the long run. human hearts and minds work against each other in a way that the reality and the obvious are no longer apparent. you need to hit a breaking point.. the point where you have nothing left the rock bottom you could call it..too make your self see what the circumstance really is.

still so busy! im back in philly modeling and doing hair its sooo cold here! i did the new york couture fashion show last night so much fun! i have tons of magazine stuff and shoots comming up im excitied for it. hannas in japan how lucky i miss her ! i miss the boy only matter time see him again. i dont even know what i want right now and its confusing life moves too fast dont waste it. i need a manicure and a week of sleep! it blows my mind that if someone reads something online its true and they will live by it until the die. if i told you all the sky was purple and it rains acid would you call cnn and the local news to tell them? stop being so god damn naive it makes me sad im so glad how my parents raised me. i didnt watch tv alot i didnt use the internet and live by magazines i was always outside or reading and active and building a mind of  reality. yes i model but theres more to life then looks and its funny to hear so much shit like audreys fat shes ugly ect ect.. i missed the memo that your worthless unless your looks are perfect .. and those people portraying that message are so far from perfection it hurts my mind to understand. not gossip tabloid bullshit. only you have the power to be who you want. dont be the new age of ignorance that has already infected our nation.  im always going to do what i want if you like it rad if not dont consume yourself with it. im happy i love my life love my carrers love my friends have best family and that my kids is all that matters.